Kieran collected the rental car from a small outfit on the Uxbridge Avenue when the place opened at nine in the morning that sunny Saturday. It was the May Day bank holiday weekend, and all the weather forecasts had predicted a glorious cloudless weekend ahead. The car was a nice new smelling Vauxhall Vectra in racing green. He drove it back to his flat to collect his overnight bag. He also picked up a copy of the old wartime newspaper, the photocopy of the Edward Gosnell cutting Ashley had brought back from the States, and the audio cassette that he had found in the archive box. He had no idea if he would need any of them, but it was better to have and not need, than need and not have. By nine thirty he was parked up outside Ashley’s house. As he switched off the engine he looked up at her bedroom window and saw her already waving at him. He watched as she turned away hurriedly. Within a minute she was trotting down the front steps outside her front door wearing a t-shirt and shorts, a small blue weekend bag slung over her shoulder and her sunglasses resting in her hair above her forehead.

  She ran around the car, opened the door and jumped into the passenger seat Kieran found himself focusing on the weave of the fabric in her t-shirt, and once he finally saw its shape, he felt in some way that he'd glimpsed a part of her that she wasn't intending to reveal.

She threw her bag in the back and put on her seatbelt. ‘Spireclaw here we come!’

Kieran grinned. ‘You don’t know how great it is to hear you say that.’

‘Yes I do babe. That’s why I said it. Nice car by the way. Was it expensive?’

He turned the key in the ignition. ‘I’m a lowly postman Ashley. I’m afraid I don’t do expensive.’

They headed into London on the M4, turning south at Hammersmith onto Fulham Palace Road, over the Thames and through Putney onto the A3. The traffic was on their side, and by ten-thirty they were the other side of Guildford.

Neither of them had had anything to eat yet, so they stopped at a Little Chef and ordered a couple of distinctly bland cooked breakfasts. At least they filled a hole, and enabled the two of them to turn their mind away from their stomachs to the question of how the rest of the day might pan out.

‘How are we going to find out where Spireclaw is?’ said Ashley, sipping her second cup of coffee. ‘I’m sure that Selsey Bill has quite a lot of houses.’

‘Unfortunately Ernest couldn’t be specific about it. We can only hope that the name is written on the house, on a placard, and that if we cover enough roads in the car we should eventually spot it. If we’re unlucky and the house doesn’t have a placard, then I don’t really know what we can do. Maybe we can ask some of the locals.’

‘If we have to resort to that we’ll definitely be reaching, don’t you think?’

‘Absolutely. Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.'

They paid for their breakfasts and were soon back in the car, heading south.

The countryside they found themselves in after they parted company with the A3 was lush and green. The roads were sun-dappled through canopies of trees. The smell through the open windows brought back memories of long summer afternoons spent sitting in other people’s gardens, smelling freshly cut grass and flowers.

They drove through Petworth and Midhurst, following long stone walls that bordered huge unseen estates.

Once they reached the ring road that bypassed Chichester, Kieran started to feel ill. Familiarity was edging its way into the corners of his mind, and it was creating an unsettled sensation in the pit of his stomach that he was beginning to find uncomfortable. ‘I’ve been down this way before.’

‘Have you?’

‘It’s a weird feeling because I’m really struggling to remember when and why, but the more I think about it the more I know that this road is familiar.’ He pointed out of the window, half looking and half keeping his eyes on the road. ‘That’s Chichester Cathedral. I’ve seen it before.’

‘Maybe in a picture.’

‘No, in real life. My Dad took me to the seaside a couple of times to see my grandparents before they moved to Canada. I was about five or six. I always thought they lived out towards Southend, Clacton-on-Sea. Somewhere round there. But now I’m beginning to wonder. Perhaps I got Southend mixed up with the south coast.’

'Why did your grandparents move to Canada?'

'When my father died, they were pretty cut up about it.'

'I can understand.'

'I guess they wanted to get away from it, banish the memories.'

Ashley was staring at him. ‘Do you think it might mean something?’

'What?'

'That you recognise this place?'

Taking a road to the left off the ring-road, following a sign that pointed towards Hunston, Sidlesham, Norton, Selsey and Pagham Harbour, Kieran said. ‘Can I answer that question when we get there?’

 

~

 

Half an hour later they were driving down Selsey High Street. Summer was in full swing in the little beach town, and rightly so; the day had turned into one of those freakish early summer days where a glimmer of a heat wave to come fills the inhabitants of Britain with hope that this might be a repeat of 1976 or 1995. Outside many of the shops, hanging up on the walls, were fully inflated dinghies of varying sizes. The yellow and black Sea Ranger III looked the most impressive, and Kieran found himself wanting one even now he was supposed to be a grown-up.

Children in t-shirts and shorts ran across the road holding ice-creams and cans of drink, causing cars to slow. Couples walked hand-in-hand looking in shop windows, or rotating wire racks of postcards that sat outside newsagent shops and second-hand bookstores.

  Bunting had been strung up back and forth diagonally across the street, the little multicoloured triangles flapping in the wind. On the lampposts they were tied to, big signs advertised the annual Donkey Derby on the Selsey Football Ground to be held on the forthcoming Monday.

'Where do we start?' said Ashley.

'I'm thinking we should head through town towards the beach. If Squadron Leader Appleby retired down here then he wanted to be near the sea. So I'm guessing that the roads near the beach are definitely the best place to start.'

At the end of the high street nearest to the sea, the shops petered out and were replaced with guest houses. The bunting stopped and with it the activity.

'Start looking for Spireclaw,' said Kieran, weaving the car out from behind a green single-decker bus that had stopped to let off some children.

'I'm looking,' said Ashley, checking the houses on the left after they passed the bus.

'Check my side too, I need to keep my eyes on the road.'

Ashley looked out of both windows. 'Most of these places are numbered Kieran. I mean, they don't have names. I think we should try some of the smaller roads.'

'I can't remember if Ernest said it was a bungalow or not.'

'Most of the houses near the sea are bungalows.'

The high street terminated at the seafront, marked by a sea wall with a gap in it and a railing where steps led down to the beach. A little girl with huge sunglasses on with pink rims was standing at the top of the steps. She threw a frisbee down onto the unseen beach and quickly ran down after it. The road here met a T-junction. To the left and right were roads which ran along the beach, and opposite the beach, across the road on either side were bungalows, stretching away from them in either direction.

Kieran pulled over and parked the car at the side of the road. He turned off the ignition. As the sound of the hot engine ticked away, the rest of the silence was deafening after having heard the car's engine for the last couple of hours.

'Let's go and have a look around, shall we?'

They got out of the car and Ashley lowered her sunglasses from her head to her eyes, looked up at the clear blue sky and inhaled deeply. 'Oh it's nice to be out of town.'

'You're not wrong there.'

  They crossed the road and stood on top of the low concrete sea wall. Below them on the beach, which was quite a good drop down, there were a number of young kids throwing a frisbee back and forth. One of them was the girl. They were laughing and shouting without a care in the world.

  'Don't you wish you were still like that?' said Ashley.

  'More often than I should.' said Kieran.

  'You're quite a nostalgic little bunny aren't you?'

  Kieran took her hand and looked at her eyes. 'The past is very important to me. It's the only thing in my life that I can quantify. I can't control how the future will affect me, but the past is like going home.'

  Ashley nodded, and tucked her hair that had been caught by the wind, behind her ear.

  Kieran looked east along the coast. Breakers divided up the beach at regular intervals, and where they met the horizon, just around the tip of Selsey Bill, he could see the drop-ramp of a lifeboat station.

  'Let's go this way.'

  They got back into the hot car. 'First shop we come to I need to buy a drink,' said Ashley.

  They drove slowly along the beach road towards the lifeboat station. As it was a quiet road, they both looked out of the window to the left. In many of the front gardens of the bungalows that faced the beach were children playing or adults sunbathing. Ashley read out the name of each house as they went past it. Houses with names like Thelassa, Sea Reach and The Hoo.

  No sign of Spireclaw.

  'I want to get another look at the beach,' said Kieran, and he parked the car.

  Ashley pointed ahead. 'There's newsagent over there, do you want a drink?'

  'Yeah, can you get me a can of coke?'

  'Sure.' She jumped out of the car, and Kieran watched her back as she jogged towards the shop.

  Choosing his best DJ voice and pitching it as low as he could, he said into the empty car. 'Damn you're good-looking.'

  He made his way up to the concrete sea wall and jumped up onto it. Putting his hands in his pockets he inhaled the sea air. Seaweed mixed with fish and dry salty wind permeated his senses.

  The tide was quite far out and the water's edge was almost still. The upper part of the beach was stony, but the stones became sand part way down, and the sand was scored by little tributaries and estuaries that led down to the water. Out to sea a speedboat was tearing it's way across the horizon, bouncing on the waves like a skimming stone, the impacts with the water were delayed in reaching Kieran's ears. He looked at the lifeboat station.

He felt icy coldness against his hand. He looked round. Ashley was standing on the grass verge holding a can of coke against it. She was smiling up at him. He took the can. 'Thanks Ashley.'

She held up what was in her other hand. A little white paper bag. 'I haven't had these in ages.'

'What are they?'

She grinned and lifted one of her legs back at the knee, like a child, her eyes squinting in the sun as she looked up at him, despite her sunglasses. 'A quarter of cola-cubes.'

'Ahh, neither have I. Not since I was a boy.' Kieran wrestled a cola-cube from the little bag. 'God, growing up is crap isn't it? All those bloody responsibilities. Why can't we be kids forever?'

He looked at the cola-cube for a moment, the quick hand of the wind ruffling his light brown hair, gusting and threatening to push him off the sea wall. He popped it into his mouth., savouring the taste of his youth.

Wrong side.

Kieran looked up at the lifeboat station, which was now just a few hundred metres away. The hulking pier of wooden struts, upon which sat a green corrugated metal house, looked vaguely familiar to him.

  'I've been here before. I really think I have,' he whispered, gripping the cola-cube between his teeth.

  'What?' said Ashley as she sucked loudly on her sweet.

  'Okay. We're on the wrong side of that lifeboat station. I've seen it before. I've seen it from the other side.'

  Kieran jumped off the wall and started down towards the car. Ashley followed behind.

  'You're having another one of your Crown Passage moments aren't you Kieran.'

  'Possibly. I just want to get a look from the other side.'

  They drove further along the road, past the lifeboat station and parked. Back on the sea wall again, standing in a gap in a long line of fishing caskets, he saw the lifeboat station this time from the opposite side and he knew he was onto something.

  Ashley sat on the wall beside him. 'What d'ya reckon boss?'

  The cola-cube, now a quarter of its original size, sat on his tongue, and the smell of it was coming in from behind his nostrils.

  Children were playing with buckets and spades at the edge of the water. Things were beginning to click.

  'My Dad brought me down here a few times when I was really young. I can only vaguely recall it, but now I'm standing here I... oh my God.'

  'What is it?'

  'Oh my God. I don't bloody believe it.'

  'Kieran, you're freaking me out.'

  'The cassette.'

  Kieran jumped off the wall and nearly lost his footing on the grass slope that led down to the road. He got into the car and hunted around for the cassette in his bag on the back seat. Ashley got in the passenger's side. Kieran found the cassette, opened the box and slipped the cassette into the car stereo.

  He pressed play.

  Nothing.

  Ashley said: 'Turn the...'

  Kieran turned the ignition.

  The tape began to play.

 

~

 

After the leader, there is the sudden sound of a baby, uttering a long happy wavering noise that sounds like he or she is being bounced on someone’s knee.

  A man’s voice speaks over the baby, ‘Up and down, up and down.’ The man sounds sort of middle aged, perhaps older.

  Stop

 

 

  'That's my grandad.' said Kieran. 'I recognise his voice. The baby is me.'

  Kieran pressed Play again.

 

 

The man is making up a rhyme for the baby. ‘Can-you see-the boats, out on-the sea? Can-you see-the boats?’

  Now a woman’s voice, she sounds middle aged too, and with no discernable accent, ‘I’ve got to go up to the shops. We need milk and flour. I don’t have enough to make this cake.’

  Stop

 

 

  'And that's my grandma.'

  Play

 

 

'Okay Darling,’ says the man.

She carries on, ‘And I need hundreds-and-thousands. Now have I got enough Bourneville? Oh dear I’d better make a list.’

‘No need to get in a flap my love there’s plenty of time,’ says the man in a calm, reassuring voice.

Strange unintelligible rumble noise, far away.

‘Ooh look, look at that!’ says the man.

Stop.

 

 

'Does that sound like a lifeboat being released to you?' said Kieran.

  Ashley rubbed her forehead. 'Play it again.'

Rewind. Volume higher. Play.

 

 

'...et in a flap my love there’s plenty of time,’

Strange unintelligible rumble noise, far away.

‘Ooh look, look at that!’ says the man.

Stop.

 

 

'Well it could be I suppose,' said Ashley.

  Play.

 

 

‘Where?’

‘Over there. Between the houses. It’s down.’

‘Oh yes. Gosh I hope nothing’s wrong.’

Stop.

 

 

'Well she says she hopes nothing's wrong, so it sort of makes sense I guess,' said Ashley.

  Play.

 

 

‘Beautiful. It’s quite majestic when you see it like that isn’t it? Not when you just…’

‘Yes… yes…’ she says dreamily, ‘Anyway, I really must go. Shall I take him with me?’

‘Yes, why not.’

There is a pause, then the man utters a strained sigh, like he is struggling to get out of his chair.

Stop.

 

 

Kieran looked around. 'My grandparents house was near here. One of the roads that leads away from the beach. I swear it Ashley. That's definitely them.'

  'How can you be sure?'

  Kieran's fingers were absently tapping the gearstick. He looked at Ashley and tried to piece together an answer for her. Then he looked out of the window, squinted at the sun and searched the world outside the car.

  'To be honest Ashley I don't know. It's as though this cassette...' he tapped the car stereo. '...this cassette has been reluctant to reveal its secrets. But we've brought it home now. Brought it back to its home town, and now that it's here, it's playing its hand.'

  Ashley stared out of the window beside her, looking at the bungalow they had parked in front of.

Kieran said: 'There are forces at work here Ashley, I'm telling you. Guardian Angels controlling us. Controlling me, sometimes in my sleep. Making me do things. Sending us places. The Red Lion. My childhood home. There's a damn purpose to all these things. The Guardian Angel has sent us on a trajectory, an arc that led to here. Maybe it doesn't end here, in the same way it didn't end in the Red Lion either, or at my old house.' He regarded her for a moment. 'You think I've gone mad don't you.'

She turned her head back to him. 'Why do you think that?'

'Because if I was you I would think I was mad too.'

She took his hand in both of hers, cradling it gently, and looked into his eyes. 'I don't think you're mad at all. I think you have hidden depths Kieran, but you're not mad. Now. Where do you think you grandparents lived?'

'Well. I don't know the name of the road. But if I'm right about this cassette, then my grandfather was able to see the lifeboat dropping into the sea from where he lived.'

'So let's take a walk up there, see if we can jog any memories.'

They got out of the car and walked towards the lifeboat station.

Directly opposite the station was a road called Lifeboat Way, leading inland.

'It's not this one. I'm almost certain it's the one we just passed.'

They retraced their steps to the previous road, Beach Drive. 'This is it. I remember it now. My grandfather took me up to the beach. We'd walk up this road and he'd sit on the wall while I...'

Kieran pinwheeled, turning and turning and trying to take it all in. Tears were filling his eyes. 'My Dad...'

Ashley took his hand and gripped it tightly They were standing in the middle of the road. There were no cars. 'Are you okay?'

'I'm getting all these sensations. Smells. Images. Feelings I haven't felt for a long long time. I can sense my Dad. He used to bring me down here and...'

Kieran was there. Aspects of age six existed all around him and within him. The smell of the cola-cube in his mouth. The shape of the streetlamps. The sound of seagulls and happy children shouting by the low-tide shoreline. The clear blue sky. The bungalows. Shapes so familiar to the coast. The distant buzz of a high flying propeller plane. Lawnmowers cutting their way through afternoon grass.

Pointing down Beach Drive Kieran said: 'Then it can only be that Spireclaw is my grandparents bungalow, that my Guardian Angel, that strange, bizarre, manipulative force has directed me to here. Using the tools of my subconcious, coincidence, luck and chance to bring me to the south coast of England.'

'Kieran...'

'And now we know where it is. Let's go and find out why.'

 

~

 

It wasn't difficult to find Spireclaw. Once the flow of events had started to carry him downstream, it was easy to find the estuary. The cola-cube had unlocked the door to his memories, and as they walked along Beach Road , the only thing that seemed different now was that he was taller.

The bungalow was just as he remembered. Overshadowed by an apple tree in the front garden, with horizontal wooden slats painted white many years before. The paint was breaking off to reveal the dark wood beneath.

The building was symmetrical. On either side of the central front door were bay windows. The curtains in each were drawn completely closed. There was no car in the driveway and the place looked abandoned.

Beside the front door was a blue wooden placard. Written in ornate text in thin brushes of white paint was the name of the house.

'Hello Spireclaw,' said Kieran. 'How have you been after all these years.

Ashley swung open the front gate and walked up to the front door.

'Wait Ashley. What are you going to say?'

Ashley stopped on the bottom concrete step of the three that led up to the front door. She looked at Kieran. 'I'm going to tell them the truth.'

'And what is the truth exactly? That I'm a lunatic who chases shadows?'

Ashley ignored him and knocked on the door.

They waited.

She knocked again.

Nothing.

'There's no-one here anyway,' she said, trotting back along the path to meet him at the gate. She tucked her hair behind her ears. 'What now?'

Kieran looked more closely at the house. He looked at the slope of the roof, the gutters and drainpipes. He looked at the neglected flower bed, overthrown by weeds and creeping vines that clawed their way up the outside of the bungalow all the way to the window.

One of the curtains moved.

Kieran's skin crawled. 'Shit. Someone's watching us from inside.'

Ashley, who was looking along the road, snapped her head round to look at Kieran. 'What?'

'Don't look now but the curtain moved. Right bay window.'

Ashley nodded. 'Okay, but why didn't they answer the door?'

'Beats me.'

'Shall we have a look round the back?'

'While they're watching us?'

'Kieran, we gave them a perfectly good opportunity to answer the door a minute ago.'

'Yeah but that still doesn't give us the right to go marching around in their back garden.' He looked at the curtain that had moved. It was now hanging still just as before. 'I mean, what the hell are we looking for anyway?'

Ashley took his hand. 'Come on babe.' She swung open the gate and pulled him through into the front garden. Then she let go of his hand and moved towards the left side of the house, where a gap between the house and the fence created a little alley that led through to the back garden.

They walked down the alley, over loosely laid paving slabs with weeds growing between and around them, past a frosted bathroom window, and into the small back garden.

The grass that made up most of the garden was waist high, and thorny rosebushes and chest high stinging nettles had taken hold of the garden from the borders by the high fences. A beautiful yellow butterfly was flapping it's way across the middle of the garden

'No-one lives here,' said Ashley. 'No-one would let their garden get like this if they lived here, surely.'

She stepped over some nettles and followed the path around the back of the house to some wooden steps that led up onto a small verandah. Ashley walked up the steps and peered in through the dusty window of the back door.

'Kitchen,' she whispered. 'it's totally empty. No fridge. No cooker.'

Kieran rose the steps to join her, stepping over some empty plant pots that had been stacked inside each other.

Ashley tried the door handle. It was locked.

'Are you suprised?' said Kieran.

She bent down and looked left and right, stepping back and lifting the doormat she had been standing on.

Kieran lifted one of the plant pots, then another.

'Here.' He picked up the silver key and gave it to Ashley. She took it, placed it into the lock and turned it. There was a click and she pushed the door slowly and quietly open.

'Okay?' she said, looking at Kieran.

'We're going to get so incredibly arrested for this.'

They stepped cross the threshold into the empty kitchen. Kieran was first hit by the musty smell. The smell of old dust. The smell of sub-basements. The smell of History.

 Ashley called out into the depths of the house. 'Hello?'

Silence.

She stepped into the kitchen ahead of Kieran. He was hoping she was thinking the same thing he was; that their intrusion would look far less sinister if it was commited by a sweet young looking girl like Ashley. Better that any suspicious tenant would see her before they saw him. But then it was really beginning to look like Spireclaw was empty, and had been for quite some time.

Kieran opened a cupboard door. It creaked slightly and he winced and bit his lip. It was empty, and was probably once a food cupboard. A thick layer of dust surrounded circular imprints where cans and bottles had once stood.

Ashley took his hand and led him deeper into the house, out through the kitchen and off to the right along a very short corridor and into the living room. His hands were sweating, and she was shaking too.

The carpet in the living room had been removed, and only the underlay remained. Pictures had been taken off the walls and were nowhere to be seen, and the wallpaper around their empty spaces had faded in the sunlight, which now streamed in through tiny vertical gaps in the curtains, lancing down to the floor and catching every fine speck of dust that passed across them.

'There's nobody here,' whispered Ashley.

Kieran nodded, and shrugged. 'I don't know who it was at the window then.' He moved over to the window where he had seen the curtain stir.

'Did you see a person?' Ashley said, her voice only half whispering now.

'No.'

'Or just a hand, holding the curtain?'

Kieran shook his head, still whispering. 'I can't remember. No.'

'Could it have been the wind?'

Kieran looked around. 'I don't see any open windows, do you? Besides, it wasn't that kind of movement. It was pulled aside, from about halfway up. Someone was definitely moving it.'

Ashley buried her hands into the back pockets of her shorts, hunched up her shoulders and looked around the room. 'What shall we do now?'

'Let's look around, but I'd rather not stay here any longer than we need to.'

'I'm down with that. Do you actually recognise this place?'

Kieran nodded. 'I used to sleep in the little box room at the other end of the hall. Near the kichen.'

'Shall we go and see?'

They walked back along the corridor.

The little bedroom was empty but for an old bunk-bed with no matresses. A tiny dusty window looked out over the alleyway on the side of the house they didn't walk down. They moved on to the master bedroom at the rear of the house. It was totally empty, although the mere presence of old lives hung in the dusty, aged air.

  'I don't know what's supposed to happen next,' said Kieran.

  'How about we go back to the car and re-examine all the stuff you brought down. Maybe now we've seen this place something that we hadn't thought was important before might suddenly be more relevant.'

  Kieran went back to the window in the living room where the curtain had moved. 'I wonder if this is where my grandfather was sitting, when he was bouncing me on his knee.'

  He opened the curtain and looked up Beach Drive and saw the lifeboat station, nested between two houses at the end of the road. Moving to the opposite bay window - the one on the other side of the front door - Kieran pushed the curtain to one side and looked out. He couldn't see the lifeboat station anymore. The gap between the two houses showed nothing but a patch of sea.

  He moved back to the first window. 'This is where he sat when the recording was made. Now I can visualise the location, I need to listen to the rest of that tape.'

They quietly let themselves out through the back door and walked around the side of the house, out through the front gate and along Beach Drive.

Back in the car, Kieran pressed play on the tape.

 

~

 

A few seconds of rustling. A door closing. It isn’t an outside door though. It’s inside, like a bedroom or a bathroom door.

The woman, whispering, ‘Pass him here.’ Then louder, to the baby, ‘Hello little you.’

The man says, ‘How long do you think you’ll…’

‘Ooh not long, just twenty minutes or so.’

More rustling, a floorboard creaking under the carpet.

She speaks again, ‘See you later.’

‘Bye love,’ the man says.

A door slams shut. Footsteps dying away outside. A car door opening.

Inside, soft footsteps walking around.

  Silence. The occasional deep breath. A cough.

  A car driving off outside.

  Rustling, then a flapping noise. The sound of wood scraping against wood.

  A light thud, like the sound a wooden spoon would make if it were hit against a chopping board.

  Fumbling, fumbling, fumbling. Another cough.

  Recording stops.

 

 

'What do you reckon that sound is?' said Kieran.

  Rewind. Stop. Play.

 

 

A car driving off outside.

  Rustling, then a flapping noise. The sound of wood scraping against wood.

  A light thud, like the sound a wooden spoon would make if it were hit against a chopping board.

  Fumbling, fumbling, fumbling. Another cough.

  Recording stops.

 

 

'I think it's a cupboard door closing in the kitchen,' said Kieran.

  Ashley was shaking her head. 'It can't be. It's too loud; too well defined. The tape recorder is in the same room all the time. I think it's floorboards. She pressed the rewind button. Stop. 'Listen, you can hear the carpet being lifted.'

  Play.

 

 

Rustling, then a flapping noise. The sound of wood scraping against wood.

  A light thud, like the sound a wooden spoon would make if it were hit against a chopping board.

  Stop.

 

 

'Okay,' said Kieran. 'That's a possibility.'

Ashley said. 'What I want to know is. How far are we going to take this?'

  'What do you mean?'

  She rested her head back on the seat. 'I mean, we've found Spireclaw. Isn't that what all this is all about? What I'm saying is, now that we've discovered that you used to visit this place as a child, do we really need to go back in there and rip up the floorboards?'

Kieran stared at her for a moment. 'I feel like I need to see everything through to it's natural conclusion. Till we reach a dead end.'

'But what if there are no dead ends. If you look hard enough you will always find clues and coincidences in your life. This could go on forever if you let it.'

'Do you really think so?'

She tucked her hair behind her ears and looked down the road towards the beach. Then she said. 'I've been thinking.'

'Thinking what?'

'Well. What if you were the one who's been writing Spireclaw.' She let her words sink in before continuing. 'I mean, is it not possible that if you can have an entire dialog with David Everett - getting him to send you those boxes - in your sleep, then maybe you went down into your cellar and wrote Spireclaw down there.'

'And in the sub-basement at work? I hardly think...'

'Well, why not? Maybe this childhood memory has been firing in your brain, in your sleep, and these random things fall out.'

Kieran thought for a moment. He examined his hands, tasted the remnants of cola-cube flavouring in his mouth. He knew deep down that Ashley could be right.

'Okay. I'm willing to accept that I might possibly - by the furthest stretch of the imagination - have written Spireclaw myself. But the question is why?'

'Like I said Kieran. Random misfiring of thoughts in the brain.'

Kieran could feel his throat closing up and tears forming behind his eyes. 'Can that really be all it is?'

Ashley took his hand. 'Let's go and sit on the beach for a bit. Try and figure it all out.'

 

~

 

They bought ice-creams from the newsagent and climbed down the steps to the beach, where they sat on the pebbles and looked out to sea. The tide was beginning to come in now, and where there were no waves before, little ones were forming and breaking on the sand.

'But where does Edward Gosnell fit into it?'

'Maybe he doesn't,' said Ashley.

'But the boxes.'

'Everyone has things in their life that they can't explain. Kieran.'

'Do they? I mean. Let's take you for example. What's happened in your life that you are unable to explain? Come on!'

Ashley stared at him. Her eyes darted between his, looking back and forth at his left and his right. She seemed to be searching for an answer. Tears welled in her eyes, and Kieran realized he’d got it wrong. She was wearing a look that said - how could you?

She stood up and started to walk off down the beach.

‘Shit,’ he whispered to himself, then got up and ran after her, recognizing his mistake and realizing the need to appease her, just as he had on the day of Phillip’s funeral, when he thought he was about to lose her through some other ill thought out statement. 'Ashley. I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking.' He took her hand and she shook it off and carried on walking. 'You aren't the only one with puzzles Kieran.'

'Ashley!’

She carried on walking, her trainers crunching on the shingle.

‘Ashley. I love you.'

She stopped, her back to him, and then she walked over to the nearest breaker and leaned against it, folding her arms. Kieran followed.

He was looking at her, and she looked out to sea, tears coursing down her cheeks. 'Since I met you I've been a new man. You've unlocked emotions in me that I didn't know were there. Do you remember when you came over to help me clean up that pigeon crap in my bathroom? New Years Day? Well when we did that, I was watching you in the bathroom and I remember thinking how special you were. How special you are. Ever since then I've thought, I want to be with this girl. I want to be with her for as long as she'll let me. And all the time I've been so scared that the only reason you liked me was because of my connection to Phillip.'

Ashley shook her head and turned her body more toward the breaker. 'To begin with that was true. But after a while...'

Kieran put his hand on her shoulder and eased her round to face him. Under her own initiative she continued the movement and ended it by putting her arms round him. They stood like that for a long time. Ten minutes, maybe not as much as that. All the while Kieran could smell the shampoo in her hair. He stared at one spot on the breaker; a knot in the dark wood. And all the time he could hear the waves starting to get louder and bigger as they fell gently on the shingle.

'Come on,' said Kieran. 'Let's make a compromise. If you let me look under the floorboards in that house, I promise that afterwards I will halt my investigation into Spireclaw, Edward Gosnell and the whole affair.'

Ashley pulled her head away and looked at him. Tears had reddened her eyes and although she was smiling and nodding, not all of the sadness had gone.

'It's a deal.'

Kieran smiled and turned towards the beach steps.

'Kieran?' said Ashley.

He turned.

'I do love you too. But it's going to take a little while before everything's...y'know...'

He nodded. 'I know.'

They walked once again along Beach Drive towards Spireclaw, and Kieran was relieved to find the house was as they left it. Though why, after what looked like years of neglect, he thought it might have changed in the last ten minutes he had no idea.

Using the key on the back verandah, they let themselves in once again.

'I'm surprised this place hasn't even got a For Sale sign outside,' said Kieran.

'Yeah.'

'I mean, who does it belong to?'

They went into the living room and Kieran looked at the floor. The underlay had been cut in large squares and laid in tessellation. Kieran lifted one of the sections and examined the floorboards underneath. He ran his hands over them and felt the edges, yet none would lift up.

'Try somewhere else,' said Ashley.

Kieran laid the underlay back down and lifted up the adjacent section. The first floorboard he tried to lift came right up in his hands.

He looked up at Ashley, who crouched down to get better look at the hole Kieran had just created.

The black rectangle in the floor revealed nothing. It wasn't even possible to see what surface was below it.

'We could do with a torch right about now,' said Ashley.

Kieran plunged his hand into the hole and started to feel around for something, or anything that would validate his return trip to Spireclaw. He knew Ashley was looking for any reason to give up and go and find a Bed & Breakfast. But he wasn't feeling anything at all. Had he just opened a portal some alien dimension?

He reached further down and felt the muddy ground beneath the house. He was lying down on the floorboards now, his whole arm swallowed up by the hole, his cheek on the deck, trying to reach as far as he could in all directions.

'Nothing,' he said eventually. 'Not a bloody saus... oh... hang on...'

He felt cold rusty metal at the extreme of his reach. He felt around it. 'It's a box. A metal box. I'm trying to get a hold of it.'

He moved his fingers along one side of the box until they came to a handle, which he wrapped his index and middle finger around and started to pull towards him. It was big, and heavy, and Kieran knew he would have to lift out another floorboard if he was going to be able to get the box up into the room.

He stood up, tested the surrounding floorboards and found a loose one. Then another, then another. Eventually he had lifted enough floorboards to be able to climb all the way into the hole.

'I'm going to pass the box up to you, then you'll need to help me get out,' he said.

'Okay.'

He climbed in. It was just like being back home in Highfield Road. In the darkness he could see tiny strips and pinpoints of light between the wooden panels that surrounded all sides of the bungalow. The rest of the crawlspace seemed empty. He picked up the metal box and passed it up to Ashley's waiting hands. She took it and placed to one side, then offered her hand to Kieran.

'I think I'm okay,' he said, grabbing splintered floorboards on each side of the hole and levering himself up into the room.

He dusted his hands against his trousers and looked down at the box.

It was a rusty metal box about half the size of a briefcase and just as deep. It had been painted green once, many years ago but the painted surface had corroded and given in to rust. It was slightly battered and dented across the top.

'She's seen better days,' said Kieran. 'Go on, open it.'

Ashley flicked the latch on the front and opened the box. The lid was stopped at just beyond the vertical by two pieces of brown string.

Inside was a stack of old letters. Kieran bent down and took the top one off the pile. It was addressed to. Arthur Whyteleafe, Spireclaw, Beach Drive, Selsey Bill, West Sussex.

 

 

Wednesday July 9th 1952

Dear Arthur,

Firstly I would like to thank you for looking after Spireclaw whilst I was away in Europe these past few months. You have shown your kindness and loyalty to me in many ways. You have treated her as though it was you who built her, not me, and for that I am truly grateful.

My time in Europe was sad. I spent a number of weeks in Warsaw and to see the devastation and ruin here brings home to me the full horror of the atrocities that were committed there. The destruction of such beautiful architecture (I had seen photographs taken before the war) made me wonder if we will ever see such wonderful and ornate design again. I fear not, because the cost of rebuilding is a factor and the sheer amount of work requires that corners must be cut. I was reassured somewhat by the enthusiasm of the people, and I am certan that the newly commissioned Palace of Culture and Science will be a stunning architectural monument to the future of Warsaw.

I feel a certain sense of pride that I was able to contribute to the liberation of that place in some small way, and that is the reason that my wife and I chose to visit.

I shall be returning from Liverpool in the next few days to discuss the other matter you mentioned in our telephone call.

Your dear friend,

Mark Appleby

 

 

Kieran finished reading the letter aloud.

  'So Appleby and your grandfather knew each other,' said Ashley.

  'Looks like it.' Kieran picked up the next letter on the pile.

 

 

Monday August 4th 1952

Dear Arthur,

Thank you for your card and flowers. I only wished you could have made it up to Liverpool for the funeral. Mother was always very fond of you, despite all the trouble we used to get into as children.

This sadness has caused my plans to change, and I have not been able to go down to Selsey as hoped. However, regarding the matter we discussed on the telephone, I have been carefully considering your request to buy Spireclaw and I am happy to say that your offer is most agreeable. Gwyneth and will be moving to Liverpool now to be near the rest of the family. We shall sort out the paperwork when I next get a chance to visit. I will write more soon when things are not so busy.

All the best to you and Pat

Mark Appleby

 

 

'So Squadron Leader Appleby sold Spireclaw to my grandad in 1952, or thereabouts.'

  'It sounds like they were pals at school or something. What did your grandfather do during the war?'

'He was a newspaper photographer.'

'You don't think he took any of the pictures in the newspaper do you?'

'I'd have to ask him. Go on, pull out another letter.'

 

 

14th April 1957

Dearest Arthur and Pat,

Thank you for your letter last month. It's wonderful to recieve news of what's going on back home in England. Montreal is truly a wonderful place but it's not the same here. Thank you for the pictures of young Graham. He is a handsome boy and will no doubt grow into a fine figure of a man. You must be very proud of...

 

'Oh my God, Kieran look at this.'

  He stopped reading the letter and looked up at Ashley. She was holding a beautiful gold necklace, with a heart-shaped pendant resting in her hand on the end of the thin delicate chain, which was broken. She had the door of the pendant open and was looking inside it.

  'What.' Kieran leaned over to see what had caused her mouth to hang open in awe.

  On the inside of the door of the heart shaped pendant was an inscription that read

 

For Henya

Qedem 'ahab

Avraham

Warsaw, 1939

 

But it was the photograph that made Kieran heart leap; the black-and-white photograph of the couple which had been placed behind glass inside the pendant.

It was a close-up of just their faces. He was a young man with a broad smile and warm eyes and short, dark brown hair and a thin face. She had dark brown shoulder-length hair and eyes that pierced the soul. She too had a smile that could banish clouds.

Ashley turned her eyes to Kieran and watched him looking at the photograph.

He said, 'Did you get this from inside the box?'

He saw her nodding out of the corner of his eye.

He looked at her, and she was looking at him in a way that he had never seen before. It was a look of pure release. She had tears in her eyes and she was wearing a smile that could banish clouds.

'Are you thinking what I'm thinking?' said Kieran, feeling the tears form behind his eyes.

'Yes,' whispered Ashley. 'Of course I am. It's us!'

Kieran nodded slowly and looked at the photograph. It was like looking into a sepia mirror. There was no doubting the incredible likeness he and Ashley bore to the couple in the photograph.

'Do you... do you think it's possible that we...could have been married in a past life?'

Kieran looked around the room. He looked at the hole in the floorboards that opened into the dark crawlspace beneath. He thought about all the events that led them here.

He took her hand in his and said. 'After everything that's happened I'm beginning to believe that just about anything is possible.'

 

~

 

The sun was getting low in the sky as they left Spireclaw. Ashley locked the back door and placed the key back under the plant pot as they departed, walking in the long cold shadow around the side of the bungalow to the front gate.

They drove back the way they came, along the sea front towards Selsey High Street in search of a guest house. They found a double room in a place called The Marine Lodge, a reasonably cheap hotel with an en-suite bathroom, a kettle, and the tide-times drawing-pinned to the wall next to the fire safety instructions.

The room smelled musty, like Spireclaw did, only not as much. The covers on the bed were old but clean and the brown patterned wallpaper had probably been hung up sometime in the mid-seventies.

Ashley opened the window. They were on the second floor and had a good view of the sea and the setting sun. They took a shower together, washing off the dust of Spireclaw and in Kieran's case, the mud from the crawlspace beneath the house. Then they changed into fresh, clean clothes and set out along the East Beach towards the Pagham Harbour nature reserve.

Away from the windy beach, in the comparative stillness of the golden evening, midges danced in the thick air above the grass, catching each ray of sunlight as it tracked downwards through the trees.

They held hands.

  'This is a perfect Saturday night,' said Kieran, feeling a favonian breeze brush his face.

Ashley put her head against his shoulder momentarily. 'It's lovely.'

Kieran put his hand into the pocket of his dockers. He pulled out the necklace and turned it over in his hand. 'For the first time in a long time I feel a sense of completeness. If it is possible that people live more than once then perhaps we have been reunited.'

'It's a nice thought.'

'I mean, it's a question of whether you believe or not. Is it possible that my Guardian Angel has been using the tools at it's disposal to get me... get us to come to Spireclaw?'

Ashley looked up at him and he kissed her mouth. 'I prefer to think that it's true, that something is watching over us, pushing us in certain directions. Helping us make decisions in our life.'

He squeezed her hand a little tighter and kissed her warm hair. 'Now, what would you like for dinner?'